What the holy balls, i haven't been blogging in what, ten piece of shit years?
A whole bull crap of shit has happened.
Right now the season's just begun.

Today for the first time in my entire soccer career (which very unfortunately only began late last year) i came onto the pitch, ready and really wanting to play a match.
4 hours before the match i imagined myself surging forward on the left flank after the kick-off.
I was holding the ball well, confident, composed and (unexpectedly) skillful and agile.
We were told that the match was postponed.
I was surprised that the slight tinge of happiness i felt (which came from the fact that yay we have another week to train) was overwhelmed by feelings of disappointment.
It's like SIA LA EMILY IS ACTUALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO A COMPETITION?!! WTF SIAL...
zzzz i think i lost the will to blog.

Staying to watch the SA VS JJ match was kinda, hmm how should i put it?
My language sucks la, can't express my thoughts clearly.
Ok erm, maybe i should start off with my belief in dribbling.
My favourite part of soccer is dribbling.
It allows you to exploit gaps in the opponent's defence, opens up options, increases the chances of your team scoring, minimises collision with defenders, brings up your morale, makes you unpredictable.
and because i'm a player with a lot of limitations,
e.g cannot cross cannot lift the ball wtf don't get me started.
I mostly rely on dribbling when attacking because everyone can do it if they want to.
It makes me feel happy, useful and confident.
When i saw SA play, one of their centre mids was wowhoo.
Everyone was fighting. Everyone wanted the ball.
I got more fired up.
Dribbling is an art and it's something i believe in in soccer.

On monday mr khoo put me back on the left wing, something i didn't expect.
I was constantly worried about not being able to play well up front.
I was bloody happy man
The flank feels like home. Maybe because i've been training there ever since Zidane knows when.
Once again i saw the beauty in football;
If you don't score at first, you keep trying and trying and trying and trying ...
until you do.
I realise that i rely a lot on sam and midzoom to receive my balls, shoot and complete the attack. but thats what football is about right?
Reliance, dependence, complementing one another?

I think mr khoo has a very bad impression of me.
He gives me the feeling that he thinks i am . ok shan't elaborate.
All i know is that to prove him wrong, the only thing i can do is to show him what i am on the field.
Recently, i've lost quite a bit, but i've gained quite a bit as well.
Well, in life i guess you gain some and you lose some.
and sometimes some things just hurt.
and you only have yourself to blame.

wow feels weird blogging.

Right now i'm trying to think of MI first half, what the hell went into me then?

Been watching Messi and Zidane lately in addition to the usual Ronaldinho and Kaka.
blown away, as always.
In the end, we all marvel at the beauty of it all.
It all boils down to one thing man.
Passion.
Everything else stems from it as well.

To be the best, you have to first think you are the best,
then make sure you are the best.
Are you willing to give up everything for the game?

Labels: life, motivation, nationals, passion, soccer