hey yo people, my life is screwed.
this morning i woke up at eleven, when i was supposed to do it at eight. damn me.
while buying lunch i had a mini chat with the wanton mee aunty;
and i actually confessed and admitted after 9 months that i lost the heart to study.
to a mere stranger.
i hate myself for saying that.
why the hell did i do it when i have it well locked up in me for nine months?
why the hell did i have to do it two weeks before promos?
why he hell did i even think i lost heart in the fist place?
maybe i didnt lose heart, i just lost the drive.
okay someone get me a car, a BMW preferably.
wow, i actually cracked a joke.
to make things worst, My Sister's Keeper was depressing yet amazingly beautifully written.
and finally, the last straw came when i realised we couldnt gurantee we would have a coach after promos.
why is the whole system so f-ed up?
i felt so insecure about this issue that i went online, desperately searching for a qualified coach, and bookmarked some pages just in case something goes wrong. tomorrow we will find ms koh to settle stuff again.
what if the one thing that all(almost) of us have been looking forward to is lost?
we only have five months to nationals. okay maybe six. i dont wish for it to be any lesser. we cannot afford to.
neither can i afford to be thoroughly distracted this two weeks.
i figured that at the most on the last day of the exams i would start on this matter IF it all doesnt work out by the time promos a.k.a doomsweek arrives.
here's a crazy thought i had:
seeking out the bukit panjang mp in a desperate plea to get us a coach and sponsor part of the training fee.
who knows we might actually end up doing just that.

okay if your impression of me as strong, macho, cool-headed just collapsed to a single grain in your mind after reading this...
its just that i value soccer as my cca and as a sport a lot.
therefore i value the only chance eleven of us have to play in the a div national football championships next year.
whether or not im an exco member.

sometimes when i have to type my email as a username,
my fingers get the better of me and i end up typing sweetlover instead of sweetclover.

when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
this time you really have to get going em.